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If you are a working mom, I’m sure you struggle with this issue on a daily basis. My daughter is five years-old and I’m just now finally getting a grasp on the work-life balance. It’s no easy feat, let me tell you. First, I need to give props to all of you working moms (and dads) who have more than one child. I can honestly say I don’t know how you do it. You are real-life superheroes, and I mean that.
With just my one, I constantly struggle with dividing my time appropriately – helping with homework, playing, doing the household chores, and of course, going to my day job. Phew. In 2019 I’m realizing that it is indeed possible, IF I’m willing to let go a little bit and not be so hard on myself.
Here are a few things I’ve learned along the way that I hope may also help you to regain your “sanity.”
1. Accept the fact that you can’t do it all and not all will go according to plan.
This is tough, I know. Especially for you type A’s who can’t settle for anything less than perfection. This was me for a long time. If the sheets didn’t get changed the same day each week I would freak out. If there was a dust bunny under the couch, I would go off. If we ate fast food a few times in a week, I would feel guilty. But, there is freedom and power in lowering your expectations a little. Ask yourself a few simple questions: Is your family happy and healthy? Are you spending quality time with your kids? Are you taking time for yourself to relax and re-energize? These are the things that are most important. The world will not end if the bathroom isn’t clean or if you eat pizza twice in a week. What matters most is that your children and family are cared for emotionally and that you do the best you can. And believe me, they already know that you are doing just that.
2. Set a family schedule – but don’t fret if you can’t always stick to it.
Set aside certain times each day to do the things that definitely need to get done. Maybe homework time is from 6:00-6:30, then bath time is from 6:30-7:00, etc. If you set a routine, then you and your kids when know when things need done and you will have more time for the other fun stuff. Of course, you won’t always be able to stick to it, but that’s OK.
3. Prep for the next day the night before.
For me, this saves a lot of time and reduces my stress tremendously. If you can, take a few minutes to do meal prep for the next day, whether it be packing lunches and/or deciding what you’re going to prepare for dinner the next evening. Have your kids pick out their clothing the night before so there’s no “monkeying” around with what to wear in the morning. Also, have the kids’ back-packs loaded up and ready for them to grab and run out the door. These little things can really help with time management in the morning.
4. Ask for help.
This is SO important. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve blown up on my husband because I felt I had so much on my plate that I just couldn’t handle it all. Apparently, he thought I had it under control. Newsflash: Most people don’t know what you need unless you actually open your mouth and tell them. I learned this the hard way. Now, if I’m busy making dinner and simultaneously helping with homework, I ask the hubby to go put the clothing in the dryer. It makes a world of difference. Why didn’t I do this sooner? Oh right, I was convinced I could handle it all on my own. Let your significant other, your kids, your neighbors, whoever it may be, lend you a helping hand. Chances are they had no idea you needed them!
5. Life is too short. Go have fun.
Do you ever stay home on a nice weekend just because the laundry is piling up and the house is a huge mess? I have many times. Of course there are things we’d all rather be doing, but these chores need done! Listen. If it’s 80 degrees and sunny outside and your kids want to go to the park, do it! I promise you won’t regret it, but you may regret wasting the day doing mundane tasks while everyone else is enjoying the sunshine.
I hope these tips help you to balance your busy life. There is no solution, just keep in mind what is most important to you and focus on those things first. Be kind to yourself and always remember to be thankful for the little things and special moments!
Best,
This is great. It’s soooo incredibly hard to be a working mom. Great stuff here.
Thank you so much for reading! Yes, it definitely is!
Asking for help is a challenge for me I think I’ll Be viewed some type of way or no one can do it better than me. but the reality is I cannot do it all and I am not super woman. Burnout and overwhelm is what I get when I don’t get help.
I was the exact same way. It took me a long time to give in and ask for help. But, you’re right. By not asking for help, it not only hurts you but your family as well. No one wants a burnt-out mom!
I’m not a mom, but I have been caretaking for my mother, so balancing different aspects of life has definitely been an issue. Good tips.
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